August - 2024

God Hires Life Coach After Series of Career Setbacks

Aug 302 min read

God Hires Life Coach After Series of Career Setbacks

Heaven - After a string of high publicity public relations disasters, God, known by some as the Almighty Creator of the universe and...

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Congress Designates August 27th National National Day Day

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 271 min read

Congress Designates August 27th National National Day Day

Washington, D.C. - In recognition of the many important National Days that have been officially declared through an Act of Congress over...

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DeSantis Bans Transatlantic Flights for State Employees

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 241 min read

DeSantis Bans Transatlantic Flights for State Employees

Tallahassee, FL - Florida governor Ron DeSantis has signed an executive order banning transatlantic flights for anyone employed by the...

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Republican Lawmakers Set Sights on Sesame Street

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 221 min read

Republican Lawmakers Set Sights on Sesame Street

Washington, D.C. - Republican lawmakers are raising concerns over the beloved American educational children's television series Sesame...

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British Doctors Use CRISPR to Edit Genome in Child Born to Asshole

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 201 min read

British Doctors Use CRISPR to Edit Genome in Child Born to Asshole

London - For the first time since the technology was developed in 2012, gene editing using the CRISPR-Cas9 system has been used to...

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Brain Changes Suggest Being an Asshole Starts in the Womb

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 162 min read

Brain Changes Suggest Being an Asshole Starts in the Womb

San Diego, CA - Being an asshole may not be obvious until a child is a toddler, but some surprising new evidence is emerging that may...

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Scientists Around the World Baffled by New Research, One of Them Says

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 142 min read

Scientists Around the World Baffled by New Research, One of Them Says

Harvard area, MA - New research performed near Harvard is baffling scientists all over the world according to one of them. Scientist...

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Area Toddler a Complete Asshole According to Medical Experts

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 122 min read

Area Toddler a Complete Asshole According to Medical Experts

Portland, ME - When Portland 5-year-old Tackle Lewinsky skips down the long cement path towards his neighborhood playground, the other...

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Very Few Chickens Receive Regular Chiropractic Care, Survey Finds

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 91 min read

Very Few Chickens Receive Regular Chiropractic Care, Survey Finds

Davenport, IA - According to a recently published survey, virtually no American chickens are receiving regular chiropractic care despite...

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JCPenney Photographer Unable to Calm Crying Infant, Vatican Weighs in

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 71 min read

JCPenney Photographer Unable to Calm Crying Infant, Vatican Weighs in

Lafayette, LA- Despite a weekend training course and several weeks of real world experience in the use of hand puppets and key jingling,...

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Pediatric Experts Recommend Apgar Score Update, More Focus on Infant Bonding

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 52 min read

Pediatric Experts Recommend Apgar Score Update, More Focus on Infant Bonding

Itasca, IL - A group of pediatric philosophers and psychologists with the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) Section on Breastfeeding...

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Danish Physicists Predict New Elementary Particle

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 31 min read

Danish Physicists Predict New Elementary Particle

Copenhagen, Denmark - Danish particle physicists from the Niels Bohr Institute have published a paper predicting the existence of a new...

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Olympics to Consider Ban of Performance Enhancing Kinesiology Tape

Zoo Knudsen

Aug 22 min read

Olympics to Consider Ban of Performance Enhancing Kinesiology Tape

Lausanne, Switzerland- Based on a recently completed scientific assessment of 3rd generation kinesiology tapes increasingly used by elite...

18 views0 comments

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