Washington, D.C. - The Trump-Kennedy Center says it plans to file a $1 million lawsuit against Krampus, the half-goat, half-demon former Republican once considered for a high-ranking position in the Trump administration , after cancelling his appearance at an annual Christmas Eve performance. Krampus, shown here posing on the red carpet at the 2025 Met Gala and right before tossing Blue Ivy Carter into his burlap sack "Krampus pulled out right after President Trump's name was

Editorial by Sumu-la-El Remember when Zagmuk used to mean something? Before it became so commercialized? Before every bazaar started selling Marduk ornaments and 12-stone diamond pendants? You know the ones, where each diamond represents a day of Marduk's grueling battle with Tiamat, the monster of chaos. I remember a time in Babylonia when Zagmuk meant a chance to come together as a people, to forget our petty differences and assist our patron deity Marduk, the Sun god and c

McDonaldland, IL - In an unprecedented move that strains the limits of Executive Office power, President Trump has issued a full pardon to one of the nation's most notorious burger thieves, the Hamburglar, who has been incarcerated in an Illinois state penitentiary since 2015. A 2015 photo of the Hamburglar's arrest after a week-long manhunt in the Pratt's Wayne Woods forest preserve near Chicago "This was a witch hunt targeting a patriot over fake crimes," Trump explained d