Washington, D.C. - One day after withdrawing from the World Health Organization, the United States has now also officially left the United Federation of Planets (UFP). White House homeland security advisor Stephen Miller, a human-Ferengi hybrid, shown here politely waiting his turn to bear spray a newborn in the face "This was not a decision made lightly," Chief of Space Operations General Bradley Chance Saltzman explained. "But it was a decision that reflected the UFP's fail

More hospitals are embracing alternative cleaning methods

New York - Scientists around the world are warning families about a hilarious but dangerous social media trend that could result in criminal charges and serious injuries, including the end of all life on Earth, or worse. Three teenagers planning their next TikTok prank. Could they be the boys that ultimately kill us all? Yes. A thousand times yes! According to Regibald Teaborne, a spokesperson for the United Nations Interagency Task Force on Global Catastrophic Threats, the t