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Experts Predict Next Big Step in Tech: Quantum AI
Near Silicon Valley - According to a number of experts in the field of predicting future advancements in technology trends, quantum artificial intelligence, known as QAI, is going to be the next big thing. Futurist Albus Macklemore, shown here using a prototype quantum computer to order beans from Costco faster than any human in history "Quantum mechanics is a simple concept that I have a complete grasp of," technology futurist Albus Macklemore explained. "When combined with


President Trump Wins First White House Mathematical Olympiad
Washington, D.C. - The results of the first White House Mathematical Olympiad (WHMO) are in, and the winner by a significant margin is President Donald Trump. Trump, shown here deep within his Mind Palace discovering the hidden connection between all prime numbers, thus unlocking a vast array of new advances in number theory and cryptography "This is the most prestigious mathematical competition ever held at the White House," Chief of Staff Susie Wiles explained. "The Preside


"Those Demons Ate My Mother-in-Law": Botched Gender Reveal Opens Portal to Hell
Morris, AL - An embarrassed couple accidentally opened a portal to Hell during a botched home gender reveal party earlier this week, leading some experts to question the practice after a hoard of Satan's minions swept through a small central Alabama town. A proud father, shown here in 2015 proudly revealing that his wife was pregnant with a baby boy and right before his entire family was dragged to Hell by a host of malevolent Hellspawn "This was a total disaster," Brad Davi
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