Louisiana will redirect its large fleet of emergency pirogues from humanitarian efforts in Greenland to the Strait of Hormuz tout de suite in order to help President Trump ranger all dat gradoo. Governor Landry, shown here with a squad from the Louisiana National Guard preparing to ship out to Iran in that pirogue they borrowed from Bubba Comeaux's uncle T-Jim in Mamou Louisiana Governor Jeff Landry overheard while waiting on a fried oyster po-boy in the parking lot of Sammy'

Washington, D.C. - Only three days after a judge blocked subpoenas served to Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell as part of a probe into potential crimes related to management of the central bank's renovation, the Department of Justice has announced that it is now seeking access to Santa's Naughty List. Santa Clause, shown here telling a child that he better be a good boy or else he won't get any presents this year, has denied visiting Epstein Island "This is the antithesis o

Pine Valley, IL - Pine Valley resident Margaret Turner, having discovered how truly unfulfilling her life would have been if she had never married her husband, died today as a result of an injury sustained when returning from a magical journey into the past. Turner, shown here with her husband a few minutes after realizing how much she still loved him, and right before her brain stem herniated through the hole in the bottom of her skull "This sometimes happens with traumatic