Republicans Obtain Copies of Anthony Fauci's Letters to Santa

Washington, D.C. - Several letters written to Santa by Dr. Anthony Fauci are now in the hands of Republicans that have today held him in contempt of Congress after refusing to answer questions about his actions during the COVID-19 pandemic at a hearing last week.

A young Anthony Fauci, shown here planning to one day use the cover of a pandemic to achieve his ultimate goal of a never-ending vacation for schoolchildren everywhere

"This is some real sick and twisted stuff," U.S. Senator Rand Paul explained earlier today. "What I read this morning in these letters is so much worse than his diary, and his diary is terrifying. It gave me nightmares. I literally dream about Dr. Fauci, like every night."

Fauci, who led the nation's response to the pandemic that killed more than a million Americans, has been blamed by Republicans for not being honest about where the virus originated as well as for harmful social distancing measures and vaccine mandates. Senator Paul, who has spearheaded attempts to hold Fauci to account, believes that the letters to Santa, written by Fauci while attending elementary school at Our Lady of Guadalupe in Brooklyn, reveal his true nature. "In one of the letters, he asked Santa for all the money in the world, which would have left no means for families to buy food or medicine and resulted in millions of deaths. He's a monster and he must be stopped."