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Elon Musk Plans Journey to Center of the Earth

Writer's picture: Zoo KnudsenZoo Knudsen

Bastrop, TX - As testing of the revolutionary Prufrock 4 boring machine nears completion, The Boring Company (TBC) owner and internet bad boy Elon Musk has announced plans to dig a tunnel to the center of the Earth.


Musk, shown here in a direct feed from his implanted Neuralink riding in a large dinosaur's mouth 4,000 feet below the surface of the Earth with his hot girlfriend and...one of his kids?
Musk, shown here in a direct feed from his implanted Neuralink riding in a large dinosaur's mouth 4,000 feet below the surface of the Earth with his hot girlfriend and...one of his kids?

"These monster machines are over 300 feet long and can produce nearly 5 million pounds of thrust," Musk revealed during a recent livestream on X while pwning noobs in the action RPG game Path of Exile 2. "I've faced max difficulty on hardcore so many times that there just isn't any any excitement anymore from these...children's games. That's why I want to feel the thrill of exploring where nobody has ever been before. I want to be the first to reach the center of the Earth itself!"


Because of the risk inherent in travelling that deep into the planet, what with the intense heat, incredible pressure, and dinosaurs, the initial attempts to reach the center of the Earth will involve uncrewed drillships. According to Musk, crewed exploration will begin in only 4 years. "That's a promise, and Elon Musk's word is like iron, as unwavering and unbreakable as my sorcerer character's armor in Path of Exile 2, which is made of iron.

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